Liver Functioning
Normally
Monday October 24, I went to the Chris O’Brien Lifehouse
arriving 7.30 am for a blood test. Had
the hassle of no form being held and had to obtain one but I was tested by 8.00
am. Barbara and I returned at 10.00 am
for our appointment with oncologist Dr Kate.
All the blood test indicators were blue, which shows that my blood
is in good condition and my liver is functioning normally. The next appointment is Wednesday 3 December
with Dr Lisa.
I asked Dr Kate about my continuing and growing feeling of
tiredness. She explained that this is
normal for people undergoing a lot of chemo.
There is a cumulative effect despite the chemo being removed from the
body by the kidneys soon after treatment.
One theory is that bone marrow production is affected, which in turn
makes the body work harder to generate blood.
Whatever the cause, cumulative build up of tiredness is usual. I should find energy returning as time passes
since my last chemo in September.
However, when I begin the third and following rounds of chemo to combat
regrowing cancer, cumulative tiredness will continue to increase.
I do not like this prognosis but I prefer to know as it helps
me understand what is taking place. I
cannot overcome such growing tiredness but I can learn to live with it. I am certainly very grateful to Barbara who
has looked after me amazingly through my times of low energy.
The Circle of Life
Six weeks ago our family attended a very meaningful funeral
service for a daughter-in-law's close relative. I
thought I would be the first to die in my age group of our wider family but it
was not so. I listened to inspiring eulogies from family and work colleagues. I learned of another migrant that has made a wonderful contribution to Australian
society including my Dad and Barbara.
At a wedding Barbara and I attended soon after, I reflected on the Circle of Life song from the Lion King. I was seeing the Circle of Life with grandparents,
children and grandchildren at this wedding celebration. Grandchildren ranged from teenagers to lots
of babies.
I recently heard on the radio that the Lion King is the most
successful musical of all time grossing over US$17 billion. The Lion King deals with life and death by
parable through the African animal kingdom.
I think it touches a chord with people of all ages. I was immersed in the Circle of Life as I watched people about me and thought of the recent funeral.
Healing
Many of you have kindly prayed for me over the last three
years, for which I am grateful. I have reflected
on this too in recent times. One pastor
friend mentioned how he has held ten healing services for Church members and
others suffering from cancer and none were healed. Can I really be healed now that I have a
stoma and require a colostomy bag? I do
not expect this to magically disappear and become normal again.
What actual research and empirical testing is done to determine
if there are genuine cases of faith healing?
It seems to me that we form our belief systems and interpret events to fit
in with them. This includes secular
belief systems such as economics. It
assumes humans always act rationally.
Being rational is only one part of human behaviour. How can such a system be valid when its view
of human behaviour in economic transactions is incomplete?
I remain agnostic in view.
I think the evidence shows that life ends when we die. That is certainly what we see in the physical
sense. Despite this view, I believe life
is worthwhile. In situations like mine,
perhaps it is how we live that is worthwhile rather than whether or not we are
healed?
Three Principles
This year, and it has intensified in the last two months, I
have been more pessimistic. Besides my
own woes, I have seen much suffering among relatives, friends and the world (eg
Ebola and the Middle East). This has
challenged my usually optimistic approach to life. Overall most people seem to struggle
throughout their lives: and yet we have a will to live!
I have been seriously reflecting on some of the situations I
have encountered lately. This has
resulted in distilling three key principles for living. This, in turn, has helped me to return
towards an optimistic view of life. The
principles are love, influence and cooperation.
Love
1 Corinthians
chapter 13 in the New Testament of the Bible is an amazing description of
what love is. Such love surmounts
obstacles and can suspend our judgment of people in difficult situations. I have experienced such this year. I see a core element of love is respect. True love is base around respect for each
person we love. I think ‘tough love’ can
be productive when built from underlying respect for the person. In situations this year, I found my love increased
when people were more open. This helped
me see the depth of issues and the hurt that was there. Such personal revelation is respected through
privacy.
On reflection, I think that the love you have given me over the
last three years is greater due to you gaining insight into my situation
through this blog and in personal conversations.
Influence
As a teenager, I could be ruthless and would quite happily
demean some one on my forward march.
During my time of being a Christian I realised this was wrong but it
took many years for this to reduce and it can still resurface. I believed in being in control and
controlling situations. I thought you
could control people. That was my state
of mind when I became a parent. My
children taught me you never can truly control another person. We see this in totalitarian regimes: when
they fall, people can be completely different.
Think of Spain: how quickly they changed after 40 years of dictatorship
ended in the mid 1970s.
I do think we can influence another person. This influence works for good when done in
love based on respect. This leads to my
third principle.
Cooperation
When I celebrated my 60th birthday four years ago, I spoke
about cooperation. That year it hit me
how we only live because human beings cooperate with each other. You can think about any aspect of life and it
depends on humans cooperating. Think
about your home: people involved in building it; people involved in maintaining
it; people involved in making the products you bring into your home; people
growing the food, harnessing the water – two essentials for life; people living
in the home together; people visiting.
Add it up and there are thousands, if not millions, of fellow human
beings involved when you trace to the production of goods and services provided
over the history of your home.
I think the highest form of human activity is cooperation (for
good, not evil). People are built
up. For me, The BezCan Project is such an activity. I did not expect to find something so new and
worthwhile in my sixties: new project, new friends, new country! I made three trips in 2013 but have been
unable to travel there for a year. I am
looking forward to spending three weeks in Kamuli, Uganda in November. Despite this, we have been able to work
together and achieve much. We have even discussed
and dealt with serious governance matters.
I think cooperation for good builds on love and influence. When I think of the World’s five great
religions: Judaism, Christianity, Islam, Hinduism and Buddhism; there is a
precious ideal that Christianity offers.
This ideal is forgiveness and reconciliation. Forgiveness releases us from bondage to
forces such as enmity and revenge. Reconciliation
enables us to work with those who have wronged us and to work through problems
that arise. Forgiveness and
reconciliation underlie love. Indeed,
does love exist without them?
Clarifying what I see as the three key principles I want to
live by – love, influence and cooperation – has come about through having a
difficult year personally and being part of other people’s difficult
situations. Seems to be a part of human
nature that trial and tribulation lead us to some of our most serious thinking.
I’ll finish this blog entry with some photos from our recent
travels.
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| On Seven Mile Beach, Tasmania in September |
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| Barbara & I at Australia's oldest Bridge, Richmond, Tasmania |
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| Barbara in the Circus, Battery Point, Hobart, Tasmania |
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| At Wine Glass Bay, Freycinet, Tasmania |
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| On our way into Wilpena Pound, Flinders Ranges, South Australia |
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| With my brother at an old farmstead ruin, Flinders Ranges |
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| Barbara going for a drive in my brother's new car |
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| Sunset over Wilpena Pound |
